Thursday, July 11, 2013

The Big Picture

Sometimes, I have to take a step back and remember that there's a big picture.... that all these little day to day scenarios that at the time usually FEEL like they are huge, really are just a piece of the puzzle.
Selling our house has proven to be a very aggravating experience. There's no one to blame for it, it simply is what it is. It's an old house, and just doesn't have some of the neat things that come with newer homes. We have a one car garage, and no master bathroom, small backyard.... and honestly, we have way more square footage than we know what to do with. This place is TOO big for us.
We were one week from closing today, when our second buyer decided to walk, despite our willingness to be flexible with her insane demands. (and yes, her demands were fairly insane. SO what does this mean for us? Well, our house is back on the market, we will have to pull our offer on the north Orem home we were just starting to get really excited about. The dogs aren't coming home at the end of the month, and we have to go back to scheduling our lives around showings.
I'll admit, I spent the morning in tears. It's frustrating to want something SO bad and work on making it happen for so long just to be disappointed time and time again.
The funny thing is... the part that upsets me the most isn't that we will lose the house we were buying. It's not that we will live here longer. Heck, being next door to Scera Pool for the rest of the Summer isn't such a bad thing. It's not that there are even more unknowns added to the plate. It's the showings. It's keeping the house picked up not being good enough... nothing short of spotless 100% of the time will cut it. It's having to leave at the drop of a hat because someone wants to see the house. That's what I'm disappointed in being back to more than anything.
But you know, it will sell eventually. This won't go on forever. This is just one piece of the puzzle, one chapter in the novel. Someday, Jon and I will be able to look back at that one time we went through Hell selling our first house and maybe at that point all the reasons this happened will make sense. I trust that there is a better opportunity around the corner, that maybe the house we were buying wasn't where we were supposed to raise our family, maybe there's a reason we don't understand right now that we need to stay put a bit longer.
I don't know. I can't make sense of it all and I am done trying to. But I'm also done crying and being upset. It is what it is and I'm working on leaving negativity behind and focusing on all the wonderful things in my life. I have an amazing husband, an incredible family, and our baby is doing well. And honestly... in the BIG picture, those are the things that matter. 

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