Friday evening Jon and I had plans to go to Hale Theater with my mom. It's kind of our thing, every year the three of us get season tickets and we enjoy going and seeing their little productions. (Well OK... we almost always enjoy going. Urinetown was in fact the worst play I've ever seen in... ever. It was awful. Whoever picked that one should be fired. Are you listening, Hale Theater?) Jon was working at Ruff House until 7pm, so my mom and I decided to grab dinner and watch TV at her house between her getting off work at 5 and meeting at the theater at 7:15pm. A bean burrito sounded really good to me, and we decided on Rubio's. Since I live pretty close to it, the plan was for me to just pick it up and meet at my Mom's.
So, off I went. It was just after 5pm so there was a bit of a line. I noticed a sweet looking old couple of (my guess) about 75 years old hobbling in behind me, and thought to myself "How cute." (I have this thing for little old couples, I think they're adorable, especially when they look so happy.) Since there was a line anyway, I didn't cut my phone conversation short until the person ahead of me was ordering. I don't stay on the phone while ordering food or checking out at the store because it's rude, so then my conversation went like this:
"Oh hey, I'm next up to order, can I can you back when I'm in the car?"
>Sure, no problem. Where are you eating?
"Rubios. I guess my baby was craving a burrito! I'll call you soon."
*click*
I didn't think anything of it, so I was a little confused when I felt a tap on my shoulder. Upon turning around, this cute little old lady said with disgust: "Well do you at least have a boyfriend that's going to make it right, or are you going to do the right thing and give that baby up for adoption?" There I stood, several people staring at the encounter, completely confused.
"Um. Excuse me?" What the heck was this woman talking about? I actually thought she was making some kind of abortion reference before she clarified, which completely disgusted me, especially considering I'm more than halfway through this pregnancy.
Her (pointing at my BARELY there belly) "Your baby. Do you at least have a boyfriend who is going to marry you to make this right, or are you going to give that baby to a proper family?"
Now, I don't wear my wedding rings right now. I desperately need to get them resized because they're too big and since I lost so much weight during this pregnancy I'm so afraid of losing them because they fall off so easily. I can only assume this is why she assumed I wasn't married, or my mom said I look really young when I don't wear makeup (which I wasn't. I hardly ever do.) but either way, the inaccurate assumption was made I was in fact single.
I stood there, in awe that this little old lady who looked so sweet, was being SO insanely rude, confused as to why I was being so rudely called out on something that wasn't even the case and EVEN IF IT WERE would be none of anyone's business, especially some stranger in line. Still trying to wrap my head around the situation, and taking note that it was my turn to go order, I replied "Not that it's ANY of YOUR business, but my HUSBAND of four years and I could not be more thrilled to be expecting!" And with that, I turned and walked to the register where I placed my order, and then joined the small group of other to-go order people waiting by the salsa bar for their food. I felt embarrassed though looking back I had absolutely no reason to be. I didn't do anything wrong. It was just awkward. The couple went to the opposite side of the building, by the exit door to wait for their food rather than waiting where everyone else was. I HOPE she was embarrassed too. I HOPE she realized how out of line she was.
I got in my car (and promptly started stuffing my face with chips and salsa) and was a weird mixture of annoyed, embarrassed, and in general just bothered that someone would make those assumptions. I am excited to have a belly that doesn't just look fat now, and this was the first time a stranger has ever acknowledged the fact I'm pregnant, it's not how I thought it would go.
I'm not sure what part of her clearly dysfunctional brain told her that it was appropriate to ask such a question. Sometimes I get *SO* annoyed with the ignorant, unaccepting bubble culture that is Utah Valley. It's obnoxious. I'm not sure if it's her generation, though I like to think that surely my grandparents have more sense than to do something like that. I can't honestly wrap my mind around her thought process. The more I try the more annoyed I am that there are actually people in the world like that.
What lessons can we learn here, folks?
1. Never, under any circumstances, is it OK to butt into a stranger's personal life, even if you are an ignorant, judgmental jackass. Whatever you're thinking.... whatever you're judging... keep it to yourself and know there's a high chance you're probably WRONG anyway. Even if I WERE some 14 year old tramp and not a happily married and stable 23 year old, she'd STILL be out of line.
2. Happily married people sometimes don't wear wedding rings. Maybe they lost them. Maybe they're too big or too small. Maybe they just left from a job that doesn't allow jewelry. None of your business.
3. Sometimes, even cute little old ladies deserve punches to the face. Though I OF COURSE would never do it. Sometimes, they deserve it, because even they can be completely rude idiots. I don't care how old and cute you are, you can't get away with being THAT freaking ignorant.
So, off I went. It was just after 5pm so there was a bit of a line. I noticed a sweet looking old couple of (my guess) about 75 years old hobbling in behind me, and thought to myself "How cute." (I have this thing for little old couples, I think they're adorable, especially when they look so happy.) Since there was a line anyway, I didn't cut my phone conversation short until the person ahead of me was ordering. I don't stay on the phone while ordering food or checking out at the store because it's rude, so then my conversation went like this:
"Oh hey, I'm next up to order, can I can you back when I'm in the car?"
>Sure, no problem. Where are you eating?
"Rubios. I guess my baby was craving a burrito! I'll call you soon."
*click*
I didn't think anything of it, so I was a little confused when I felt a tap on my shoulder. Upon turning around, this cute little old lady said with disgust: "Well do you at least have a boyfriend that's going to make it right, or are you going to do the right thing and give that baby up for adoption?" There I stood, several people staring at the encounter, completely confused.
"Um. Excuse me?" What the heck was this woman talking about? I actually thought she was making some kind of abortion reference before she clarified, which completely disgusted me, especially considering I'm more than halfway through this pregnancy.
Her (pointing at my BARELY there belly) "Your baby. Do you at least have a boyfriend who is going to marry you to make this right, or are you going to give that baby to a proper family?"
Now, I don't wear my wedding rings right now. I desperately need to get them resized because they're too big and since I lost so much weight during this pregnancy I'm so afraid of losing them because they fall off so easily. I can only assume this is why she assumed I wasn't married, or my mom said I look really young when I don't wear makeup (which I wasn't. I hardly ever do.) but either way, the inaccurate assumption was made I was in fact single.
I stood there, in awe that this little old lady who looked so sweet, was being SO insanely rude, confused as to why I was being so rudely called out on something that wasn't even the case and EVEN IF IT WERE would be none of anyone's business, especially some stranger in line. Still trying to wrap my head around the situation, and taking note that it was my turn to go order, I replied "Not that it's ANY of YOUR business, but my HUSBAND of four years and I could not be more thrilled to be expecting!" And with that, I turned and walked to the register where I placed my order, and then joined the small group of other to-go order people waiting by the salsa bar for their food. I felt embarrassed though looking back I had absolutely no reason to be. I didn't do anything wrong. It was just awkward. The couple went to the opposite side of the building, by the exit door to wait for their food rather than waiting where everyone else was. I HOPE she was embarrassed too. I HOPE she realized how out of line she was.
I got in my car (and promptly started stuffing my face with chips and salsa) and was a weird mixture of annoyed, embarrassed, and in general just bothered that someone would make those assumptions. I am excited to have a belly that doesn't just look fat now, and this was the first time a stranger has ever acknowledged the fact I'm pregnant, it's not how I thought it would go.
I'm not sure what part of her clearly dysfunctional brain told her that it was appropriate to ask such a question. Sometimes I get *SO* annoyed with the ignorant, unaccepting bubble culture that is Utah Valley. It's obnoxious. I'm not sure if it's her generation, though I like to think that surely my grandparents have more sense than to do something like that. I can't honestly wrap my mind around her thought process. The more I try the more annoyed I am that there are actually people in the world like that.
What lessons can we learn here, folks?
1. Never, under any circumstances, is it OK to butt into a stranger's personal life, even if you are an ignorant, judgmental jackass. Whatever you're thinking.... whatever you're judging... keep it to yourself and know there's a high chance you're probably WRONG anyway. Even if I WERE some 14 year old tramp and not a happily married and stable 23 year old, she'd STILL be out of line.
2. Happily married people sometimes don't wear wedding rings. Maybe they lost them. Maybe they're too big or too small. Maybe they just left from a job that doesn't allow jewelry. None of your business.
3. Sometimes, even cute little old ladies deserve punches to the face. Though I OF COURSE would never do it. Sometimes, they deserve it, because even they can be completely rude idiots. I don't care how old and cute you are, you can't get away with being THAT freaking ignorant.
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