Over two months ago, I went on vacation. While I was gone you ran away from home. For two months, I drove the neighborhood every day, hoping to find you and bring you home again. I laid in bed praying that you were OK.
Let's face it: you're a pretty dumb cat. You let Champ carry you around by the scruff. The odds are not in your favor out there.
Halloween was tough. You're such a beautiful dark chocolate kitty, easily mistaken for black. I know what moronic kids do to black kitties on that day. I cried myself to sleep.
Then, one day, I saw you! You were a block away, had been missing about a month, and you were fat, dingy, and so timid. You were never timid before. I cried for you when I couldn't catch you before nightfall.
Winter rolled in. Every night it got colder, I worried for you.
Then tonight, 63 days after you went missing, there you were, in the driveway. I was beyond thrilled when you didn't run this time, you ran to me and leaped in my arms. I'll even forgive you for scratching my shoulder, but don't make a habit of it.
I brought you inside, and can't believe you're home again. My Ellie. My kitty.
You stink, a lot... like stale cigarettes. I'm sad you had to live in that stench, for however long you did. I'm glad someone was taking care of you enough to let you inside, but I wish they cared enough to see if you have a microchip (which you do!) so you could come home to me. You're a little skiddish, but we'll get back to how things used to be, I hope. I wish you weren't SUCH a dumb cat, and would just leave a dang collar on.
ps. Your never going outside again. Ever. SO, I hope you had fun.
The moral of the story, folks: If you ever find a friendly kitty, PLEASE don't assume they are a stray. Take them to a vet to have them scanned for a microchip. ANY vet will do this, and it WON'T cost you anything. Post fliers. PAY ATTENTION to fliers posted in your neighborhood. You might think you're doing a good thing, but you never know who is out there driving, possibly right by your house, night after night, looking for their pet.