Tuesday, March 24, 2015


I participate in a few online groups somewhat regularly and last week a question was asked that has been on my mind a lot this week.

What makes you feel successful? 

I read through the responses, all very valid. A promotion at work. Finishing a project. Buying a house. But it made me think of how differently we all define success, and how only our own personal definitions matter. 
So all week I've thought: what makes me feel successful? 
It's funny, because by the world's standards, Jon and I are wildly successful for our age. 
At 20 & 23, we bought half of a small business. 
Shortly after, we purchased the other half. 
At 21 & 24 we bought our first home. 
At 22 & 25 we purchased our first boat. 
Jon got his degree in Forensics and landed a job working in a lab within a reasonable amount of time. 

I do consider us successful, but not for these reasons. When I think of the successes in my life, it's a different set of reasons.
I don't care about business. Sure, yes, I have a passion for animals and am incredibly blessed to have our doggy daycare in my life. Without it, there is NO WAY that we would be able to support ourselves AND me be a full-time stay at home mom to Chase. Being his mama is the biggest blessing in my life, it gives me purpose, enjoyment, fulfillment, and I wouldn't change it for the world. I am so so glad that Ruff House is a successful business, not because I dream of being a successful businesswoman but because I care to be home and present for Chase and any future babies to come. As much as I wish our economy was such that a family could make ends meet by one adult being the college-educated provider and one being the nurturer and homemaker, it's not that simple. We need supplemental income to Jon's job and business ownership has made that possible without the requirement of me going to work out of our home on a daily basis. 
Being a stay-at-home, present mother makes me feel successful. 

When buying or selling property there's a lot of talk about value, equity, profit, loss, value, etc. I don't care about any of that. I am just thankful to have a safe place to call home and a place I am comfortable raising my babies. Equity doesn't matter. It's our home. The comfort and peace that comes from that is not measurable by dollars. Owning it allows me to explore my passion for ethical dog breeding, something I could not do renting. 
Having a place to call home makes me feel successful. 

Days I feel most successful are when my husband comes home to a clean house, my baby is happy, and I can get healthy, home cooked food on the table. It doesn't always happen, in fact, it hardly ever all happens on the same day, but it's what I aim for. It is important to me to fulfill the role I feel I was put here to do. I feel successful when I fulfill my duties as the homemaker in our family.

I find things get in the way of what's important to me. I get sucked into technology and spend too much time looking at a screen when I should be looking at my sweet little boy who is growing up way too fast. The definition of success and what makes someone feel that way is not universal but I am pleased to have found what does it for me in my life.

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