Goodbye Facebook, Hello Life

Yesterday I realized a few things. That's what tends to happen when you spend TWELVE hours on the road with nothing to do and no one to talk to. You realize things. Like how your sweatpants have more holes in them than you thought... and that your steering wheel s grossly dirty. Unfortunately sometimes you also notice that one or more of the three 100+ lb dogs in the car has awful gas. But beyond that...

1. I care too much what everyone thinks. From family to friends, I make too many decisions based on what other people would like or expect of me. I need to knock that off.

2. For as long as I remember, I have this serious need to gain acceptance from other people. I need to knock that off.

3. It gets to me way too much when other people are disappointed in or upset with me. I mean like... if someone is mad at me, I loose sleep, I ache, I'm upset for a long, long time. I need to knock that off.

In further thinking about what I want in life, and what things I am going to commit to work on personally I decided the first step in becoming happier with myself, is to eliminate the things and people who don't matter. Not that I don't like most of the people I associate with... but, what Joe schmoe on the internet thinks shouldn't matter to me. So, what did I do? I deleted my Facebook page. Why?

1. I spend too much time messing around on Facebook and not enough time maintaining my house, spending time with the people actually IN my life, and focusing on Ruff House and Velcro Danes. Those are better ways to spend my time.

2. I don't need the arguing or the drama that comes along with Facebook.

3. Because really, why the heck not? Why keep the stupid thing? Because everyone really gives a crap where you went to lunch or what you think of the President? No.

I will probably blog a bit more than I did... because, well... I have crap to say... but for now, my life is off of Facebook. I will still put Velcro Danes stuff on the Velcro Danes page.... but personal Facebooking is over, and I figure that those who really matter and are really interested in me and I them, they'll still be there.

So, Goodbye Facebook, Hello Life.

It's kind of liberating, actually. You should try it!

Shootings, Guns, and Criminals

What happened today in CT is a true tragedy of the most horrific kind. Those who prey on children (and animals!) are the most disturbed of individuals. Because of which, I feel sorrow that the individual who opened fire had to live in his own mind, and that there wasn't help that was so obviously needed. I feel sad for the lives lost, and for the families that enter this holiday season with an empty void in their hearts for the loved ones lost.
When tragedy strikes, people talk. They talk about what should have been done different. They talk about how it could have been prevented. They talk about why it happened.

This time it's guns.

Shootings, particularly school shootings aren't just something I've heard about on the news. On a morning in 2001, I was in sixth grade. I went to Cajon Park Elementary, and it was just another day... until we went on lock down because someone opened fire at the high school, Santana, just a couple short blocks down the road. What does that have to do with me? Five members of my family, including both parents in the home, were on campus. I sat there at the age of eleven as my classmate's parents and siblings came and checked them out of school until I was the only one left. All I knew at that point was that of the six people living in my house, FIVE of them were on that campus, including my mother... stepdad, step brother... sister, brother.... I watched as my classmates were taken home by their families and wondered why mine had not come for me, too. My mind at that time did not comprehend that being school employees they were first taking care of the students on campus and trying to help in the chaos ensued by fear. My teacher at the time tried to tell me she was sure my family was all just fine but even at the tender age of eleven I could tell she had no idea, and there were no promises. Where were they? Why did no one come for me? Could they? Were they hurt?  Were they alive? Finally my step brother showed up for me, it was afternoon, and a couple hours had passed since every last one of my classmates had left.
I was not on campus. I did not live through the horror of watching people shot, wounded, killed. I did not have to run through the halls in the chaos. But my life HAS been very personally effected by a school shooting. I am thankful that all five members of my family made it home safely that day. I share this because I've been accused of not "understanding" the gravity of the "gun problem" our country has today due to my stance on it.

I've seen all this gun control talk today. SO many people blame legal gun ownership and want stricter rules, some even vote for the downright ban on gun ownership.

The problems in this way of thinking are plenty.

1. It follows the notions that criminals follow laws, which the very nature of being a criminal contradicts. Guns being illegal to own will not stop criminals from owning them because the reality is most gun crimes are committed by people who can not legally have them anyway!
2. It takes away the legal use of a firearm to protect yourself, your family, or your property. When these mass shootings happen it is nothing short of a tragedy. You see them on every news channel and every news website. But, rarely do the stories of the lawful use of firearms to SAVE live and protect ever make it off the the fourth page of the local newspaper. Murderers and rapists stopped, lives saved.... thanks to gun ownership.
3. I can't help but wonder if some of these people would be so quick to open fire if they KNEW that a high percentage of people were also carrying firearms... so on the flip side I can't imagine how many MORE might if they knew for sure that no one else was.... chew on that for a minute.
4. It places blame for criminals on people who are not guilty. Plenty of shootings are committed by minors. You have to be a minimum of 21 years old to own a gun in any of the 50 states of America.

The following list of prohibited persons are ineligible to own firearms under the Brady Handgun Violence Prevention Act.

• Those convicted of felonies and certain misdemeanors except where state law reinstates rights, or removes disability.
• Fugitives from justice
• Unlawful users of certain depressant, narcotic, or stimulant drugs
• Those adjudicated as mental defectives or incompetents or those committed to any mental institution and currently containing a dangerous mental illness.
• Non-US citizens, unless permanently immigrating into the U.S. or in possession of a hunting license legally issued in the U.S.
• Illegal Aliens
• Those who have renounced U.S. citizenship
• Minors defined as under the age of eighteen for long guns and the age of twenty-one for handguns.
• Persons convicted in any court of a misdemeanor crime of domestic violence (an addition)
• Persons under indictment for a crime punishable by imprisonment for more than one year are ineligible to receive, transport, or ship any firearm or ammunition

Those who already own firearms  required to relinquish them upon conviction.

The above list also sums up a vast majority of the people responsible for the violent crimes involving firearms or other weapons.Illegal. Unlawful. If the gun laws we already HAVE were followed then things like this wouldn't be happening. More laws isn't the answer, better attention to the ones we already have is.
Maybe better attention to mental illness and getting people treatment? Maybe better protecting our schools which seem to be where these horrors happen most? Maybe being kinder to our fellow human beings and not too self-absorbed in ourselves? I don't know what all the answers are... but I know that taking away the ability to protect ourselves isn't it.

My thoughts aren't because I don't understand the gravity of these shootings. It's not because I don't think we have a problem. 28 people lost their lives today. 20 of them were children. Innocent children whose lives had barely began. I do not overlook the tragedy of that. Something needs to change. But guns are not to blame. The sick man who [illegally] armed himself and opened fire [where it is illegal to have guns no matter what] and took these innocent lives is. No law would have saved lives today.

My heart goes out to the victim's families who instead of feeling the magic of the Holiday season are left heartbroken as they plan the funerals of loved ones taken too soon. I hope that the empathy and sorry for what happened is not lost in all of the gun debates that are sure to continue.

A Month of Thanks

This month, everyone is posting all the things they're grateful for on Facebook daily. I often times get so busy and caught up in responsibility that I forget the hundreds of things I'm really thankful for, so I figured I'd just make one big giant thankful post. 

1. I'm thankful for my family, including Jon,  that has been there for me.

2. I'm thankful for my pets that make me laugh and smile every single day- even if they are kind of naughty. 

3. I'm thankful for my small circle of friends who accept me for me without judgement- they're family, too.

4. I'm thankful for the roof over my head, and that I have a comfy place to sleep at night. 

5. I'm thankful for my employees that make Ruff House what it is today.

6. I'm thankful for the opportunity to run Ruff House and the lessons it's taught me. 

7. I'm thankful for people who support small local business, because they help me support myself and my employees. 

8. I'm thankful for the beauty of four seasons.

9. I'm thankful for the opportunities for charity that cross my path. True joy is found in charity. 

10. I'm thankful for the healthy food that I have access to that has helped me obtain better health.

11. I'm thankful for the people that have come into my life as I follow my passion of ethical dog breeding. 

12. I'm thankful for the trials of my past that have made me who I am today.

13. I'm thankful for my in-laws that have been there for Jon and I.

14. I'm thankful for the gospel.

15. I'm thankful for the experienced ethical dog breeders that have taken the time to help and educate me. 

16. I'm thankful for my vet, who has been a wealth of knowledge for me.

17. I'm thankful for the knowledge I've gained that has led me to making more eco-friendly choices, and the people who have brought that knowledge to me. 

18. I'm thankful for the financial stability that has allowed me to put clothes on my body, and food on the table. 

19. I'm thankful for the skilled doctors and surgeons that have helped me get healthy this year.

20. I'm thankful for the internet, the people its brought into my life, and how easy it makes it to keep in touch with loved ones miles away.

21. I'm thankful for my dependable vehicles, and that we are able to maintain two vehicles.

22. I'm thankful to live in America.

23. I'm thankful for the right to vote.

24. I'm thankful for the scriptures and the answers I've found in them.

25. I'm thankful for the lessons I've learned from animals.

26. I'm thankful for books, and the stories and lessons they provide. 

27. I'm thankful for my education- limited as it may be. 

28. I'm thankful that I have the drive to constantly learn more, and for the resources to do so.

29. I'm thankful I have an understanding of the importance of living green, and that I've changed habits that I can pass down to my kids.

30. I'm thankful for the desire I have to constantly improve. 

31. I'm thankful for the freedom of speech... because you know I've got an opinion on everything. 

32. I'm thankful for my health.

33. I'm thankful that I have the freedom and right to be myself. 

I'm sure I'm thankful for a lot more, but I'm hungry, so I'm going to go eat the food I'm thankful for. 

Just Sayin'

The Thing About Elections....

It's that time of year: election season. I am a firm believer in how important it is to vote, no matter what you believe- vote, vote, vote. I feel like it's one of the things that really sets this country apart, and I think it's incredibly important for American citizens to be involved with the political process.
That said, I'm amazed at how quickly friends, family, and co-orkers turn on each other over their support of one candidate over another. Let's be real here: neither candidate is perfect, so it absolutely surprises me how many people are so shocked when one or the other says or does something completely stupid, and then they use that to put their own candidate on a pedestal.
I think what irks me the most, is that SO many people sit on their high horse and point the "stupid" finger at anyone who disagrees with them. It's like people seem to forget who their friends are and just attack anyone who isn't voting the way they are. Now, I'm a fairly outspoken person. I have my beliefs, I stand by them, and I don't really give a damn what anyone thinks of them, so in all honesty, I can't be THAT surprised when I tick people off. I even rubbed a cousin the wrong way for voicing that based on the incredibly ignorant statements on women's bodies and rape they have no business making decisions for women. (well they HAVE, and despite the fast I'm voting Republican this year, I can recognize that!) DO I care if people disagree with me? No. Not at all, and if they choose to be offended by my beliefs there's not much I can do about it. But, even my Mom of all people got "hate mail" from a so called long time friend calling her blind for the simple act of "liking" one of the candidates on Facebook. People who would never dream of intentionally offending anyone, people who are very subtle in sharing their thoughts, people who do not put their beliefs out there bluntly for the world to criticize are getting attacked.And the thing is- this doesn't change anyone's mind. Telling me I'm stupid isn't going to make me vote for someone else, it's just going to make me want to punch you in the face for being a jerk.

So, a few things to remember before you jump down someone's throat over the election:
1. Two different opinions doesn't make either one stupid or blind. Stop calling people ignorant, blind, or sheep just because they don't agree with you.A business owner, a coal miner, and a stay at home mom might all have different political views which are influenced by their person life situation and how the policies effect THEM.
2. Neither candidate is perfect.
3. Before you attack someone, ask yourself if the election is really worth tainting relationships over. I can't think of any that are.

Whether you think we can't afford another 4 years of Obama, or you're still feeling the promises of hope and change- vote, and stand by your beliefs without being a jackass. :-)

What am I for? I'm for lower taxes. I'm for proof of citizenship. I'm for working hard. In the words of Tim McGraw: "Democrat, republican.... guess I'm screwed I'm neither one."


Talk about irony, not 5 minutes after posting this to Facebook, I get: "You're not who I thought you were, I can't believe you'd vote for Mitt, blah blah blah"
SO much for the message I was going for. 

It IS Easy Being Green

In the last couple years, I have slowly become more and more.... green. I never really had an exact "ah ha!" moment, it seems to have come topic by topic, and slowly. We've made so many little, subtle changes as I have become more and more aware of what so many "convenience" items have done to our Earth, that I woke up today and realized all these little changes have added up to us being kind of weird! So, I feel prompted to throw some of our green living choices out there, and maybe explain them a little.

Cleaning Products

This was probably one of the first things I remember being more aware of. I don't know if it was more that they bothered me, or that I was worried about their harsh effects on the pets in our house, but most commercial cleaning products just don't have a place in our house.
GREEN ALTERNATIVE: A simple yet effective mix of white vinegar is sufficient for nearly ALL messes. I'm still guilty of the occasional bleach for particularly yucky/ dangerous messes, but it's few and far between. Plus, it deters ants (are you listening, Mom!) and other pesky critters and is safe on most surfaces.
GREEN LAUNDRY ALTERNATIVE: So, I've wanted to try soap nuts but haven't gotten around to that just yet, but I DID recently discover a natural laundry detergent that I am really liking called The Laundry Tarts.  Now, I've been a pretty loyal Tide user for as long as I've been doing my own laundry... which... well, OK, so we weren't allowed to do our own laundry at my Mom's house so not that long, but still. But this stuff is AWESOME. I love it. Love, love, love it. It comes in really delicious scents, and is completely effective. I also really like their stain remover stick. I buy them both at this little WAHM online shop that I love. (I have a bag of Eco Sprout that I have not tried yet, but I will report back on that. I do NOT like Rockn' Green)

Disposable Storage/ Containers

Jon and I used to FLY through plastic baggies and the like, and I admit that there are still some in the pantry. (No, wait, my house is old and doesn't have a pantry... they're in cold storage... this creepy dark closet in the basement that locks from the outside and gives me the heebie jeebies) We used them for everything, storing left overs, packing snacks, etc. Also, bottled water and drinks were huge around here. So convenient!
GREEN ALTERNATIVE: I started buying glass jars to carry drinks around, and stainless steel mugs to make hot cocoa at home with to take to work. (money saver, too!) I am guilty of picking up drinks in plastic containers at times, but I do make it a point to reuse them for a while... like the Gatorade bottle I've used for a solid week now. I also started string food/ leftovers/ snacks in plastic rubbermaid containers instead of baggies. I know glass is more eco-friendly, but this is a step for us anyway. This is an area that our green changes really take no effort to implement.

Food

Wasteful packaging on processed foods are just as bad for the planet as the food is for our bodies. Plastic wrappers sit in landfills for years and years. Not only that, but the food itself is full of chemicals and preservatives to make it last on the shelves for years and years.
GREEN ALTERNATIVE: Jon and I have almost made a challenge/ game out of NOT buying and eating a ton of packaged foods anymore, and trying new things in the kitchen. I feel like we're being better to the environment and better to our bodies, so it's a win-win. I use the crock pot a lot, avoiding the fact that means running it all day. I do still buy canned beans, but I'm going to make the switch, I swear.

Shower & Body Products

How much sense does it make to cover yourself in chemicals? How much sense does it make to have a meal full of chemicals? None. But, most people do it every single day as they shower and use lotions and the like. Because your skin is the largest ORGAN of your body, and it absorbs every single thing you put on it, I've adopted the idea that if I can't/ wouldn't eat it- it doesn't go on my skin, either.
GREEN ALTERNATIVE: On shampoo, the simplest, cheapest, and most effective alternative to chemical-laden shampoos for me has been to simply not use it. That's right, I've been converted to the world of no-poo. In fact, I have not washed my hair in almost two months. I rinse it almost daily, put a little organic, cold-pressed coconut oil on my hands, and run them through my hair, and done! No shampoo, no conditioner, no gel, no mousse. I occasionally rinse with Apple Cider Vinegar. I have naturally curly, dry hair... and it's never been more manageable than it is with this routine. Less frizz, way less tangles, and I'm wearing it down more than ever. Best lotion? Plain Coconut Oil, which is also a great make-up remover, and makes the dogs smell edible. Seriously, anyone that knows me knows that I have the craziest most obnoxiously sensitive skin in the whole world.

Lady Products

Men, tune out. (yeah right, like men read this blog... does ANYONE read this blog?) I'm for real blogging about periods, because it's my blog and I'll post what I want to! So, commercial menstrual products creep me out, let's just be real. All those chemicals don't belong around the lady bits. But, aside from that factor, these products hugely affect our landfills because they virtually never break down. Considering a single woman will likely use over 15,000 single pads/ tampons in her lifetime and there's like... a crapload of women on this earth, that's a whole lot of yuck.
GREEN ALTERNATIVE: Ok, so when I first heard of menstrual cups I thought it was bat sh*t crazy. I mean, that thing goes where? Youch! But, then I bought a Diva Cup, and never looked back to tampons, which now officially gross me out to even think about. Plus, because it's silicon, and completely safe, and holds a ton it lasts 12 hours which means you virtually NEVER have to deal with periods in public bathrooms. I also discovered "mama cloth" which at first I thought was completely nuts, but since I have completely stupid skin that likes to react to everything in the world, commercial pads aren't even an option for me, so I bought an entire stash of cloth pads, and I love them. I bought some from here and here and here and here. Cleaning them is so easy there's virtually no ick factor. And, they're so cute it's almost fun. Ok, so it IS fun, don't judge.

Looking Forward

I feel like we've made a huge dent in our overall wastefulness. I don't  feel like any of the changes we've made so far have added any headache to our daily life, in fact most have really made things easier, and I like knowing that we are doing our part.
Some other changes that we will implement moving forward are:
-Unpaper towels. We already use cloth rags for moth things to minimize our use of paper towels but I want to really take the plunge into unpaper towels and do away with paper ones.
- Cloth Diapering- Ok, confession: I have more than a full stash of them, but I'm committed to using them when we have kids. Disposable diapers are one of the things filling our landfills faster than any other item.
-Breastfeeding- It's what boobies were made for, duh!
-Cloth shopping bags- self-explanatory.
-Composting- think of all the yard waste people throw out, usually in a huge plastic bag, taking up space in landfills when it is completely 100% biodegradable. And dog poop. When we move, I'd like to start seriously composting.
- Gardening- Obviously the "greenest" way to get your food is to grow it yourself.



But, I don't think we are cut out for family cloth. Ever. In fact, it's not even up for discussion. (cloth toilet paper)

A Little BSC

SO, the last month or so I've been really focused on this whole self-betterment theme I've adopted. I've been eating healthier, with small portions. I've been trying to be more active and at least getting out every day.I've been working a lot less because I realized that work-related stress was doing some serious damage to my overall health. I've even made an effort to spend more time with the people who are most important: family. (Plus, when you spend all day at Grandma and Grandpa's chatting for 8 hours, they also feed you lunch AND dinner, which is cool, too)
In High School, and a bit after, I really thought friends were the most important thing in the world. I'm not saying I don't care about friends, because I DO, and I always will... but I've found in recent years, that the people that matter the most, the people who come to mind when I think "friend" are also family.
A couple of weeks ago, it came up in conversation that somehow I live in Orem and had never been to Sundance or Park City. My mom spent ALL DAY LONG driving all over Park City and Sundance with me.  I mean all over. We left early in the day, she showed me so many neat places, some that she had been to with my dad (I do have one... somewhere.. I think...) some that have good food (noted!) some places good for shopping, people watching, etc. I had a complete blast. I actually had to stop on the way back down Provo canyon and think 2008, four years ago, I never thought I'd be close to my family again. And now, here I am, hanging out with one of my best friends, having a blast, we did nothing extreme and yet it's a day I won't ever forget, because that best friend is also my Mom. I am so sad my bad attitude kept this friendship from me for so many years, but I'm SO thankful to have it now.

I LOVE that my family is so close. I love that in 5 minutes, I can get to my sister's, brother's, grandparent's, and mom's house. I love that almost EVERY week we get together and have dinner, chat, hang out, and LAUGH. I love that we love each other. I love that I can count on them for anything. I love that I can count on ANY time I am with my sister Tanya, laughing my head off (and probably eating cookies, too.) and I LOVE that every now and then I can even get Mitch to chuckle. I LOVE that even though Shelly lives in Texas and we don't talk nearly as much as we should (don't ask why she lives there, I think it's silly!) I know I can pick up the phone and call her any time and I hope she KNOWS how much I look up to her, and always have. Let's face it, I have a hard time making Mac & Cheese sometimes, so I admire anyone that makes home made butter. For real.

I'm going somewhere with this, I promise.

Jon and I have had some big decisions to make. We've been talking, and praying about where we are supposed to raise our family, where we are supposed to put down roots, and where we want to call home in the long run. We've fought with this want to have acreage (and a cow!) and this want to stay near family. Every day we have struggled to make this decision so we can start planning. The reality is the farm life we've wanted probably won't happen around here. We both feel strongly that while we WISH Jon's family were closeby, Las Vegas is not for us. I had a complete moment of clarity tonight, and couldn't wait to share it with my husband. Sitting at Mitch's house, the room full of family, I listened as he told us about the family temple night Friday that Jon and I were not able to make it to. I listened as he told us a message that was shared with them. I listened as the realization of exactly what we are supposed to do hit me.

I'm not sure how it will work out. I'm not sure where Jon will work. I'm not sure how easily I will accept a life in the suburbs. What I do know, is moving away feels wrong. Leaving family feels wrong. I've had this feeling off and on for a while, that staying would be best, but kept reasoning with myself that there was still time to decide, and that we didn't need to come to a decision now. But tonight was different. I know without the shadow of a doubt that right here in Utah Valley is where we NEED to be, and this is where we will stay. I mean, after all... I LOVE THE MOUNTAINS. (stop chuckling, Mom)

Even if they are a little Bat Sh!t Crazy, they're my family... and I'm so lucky to have them.


Completely Off topic, unrelated note: I'm dang near ready to decorate for christmas, so DECK THE FREAKIN' HALLS. Fa la la la la..la la la la.